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05.02.09 @ 6:43 p.m. // jesus christ.
so, once upon a time in the land of reality, there was a disease that was christined 'influenza.' various strains of this sometimes fatal, but most often just really fucking annoying illness befalls us every year. some of the citizenry dutifully inoculates themselves against it, and if the CDC's magic 8 ball sees its shadow on leif erikson day, that year's vaccination may or may not actually inoculate against that year's flu. it's kind of like a game, except not fun. this is a yearly tradition, and every year the majority of us manage to survive. moreover, we manage to not fly into a fit of hysteria and soak ourselves in clorox and brick ourselves into our homes. so to all of you, i bring a message of hope from us in the retail realm. 'tis true that no, we have no more hand sanitizer, and no, we have no more masks. there is nary a can of lysol to be had in all the land. but here's a thought: perchance you could WASH YOUR HANDS, TAKE A VITAMIN, and CALM THE FUCK DOWN. it's just a thought. i don't know. i didn't go to college.  last | host | next |