03.21.03 @ 3:17 p.m. // in which the world is stupid, and there's nothing i can do about it.

i see by the news that, yesterday, whereas i spent my day washing clothes, changing diapers, and running errands, some of you were busy disrupting traffic and making a general nuisance of yourselves-- because, somehow, making little kids late for their soccer games and businesspeople miss their meetings is going to usher in world peace. really, guys, the least you could do is refrain from laughing when you are arrested. you know, some of us have "lives" with "jobs" and "hobbies" and "families to support." seriously! whacked, but true.

please be sincere enough about your message to not giggle and grin throughout the whole ordeal. being arrested is just not that amusing. also, please feel free to imagine any number of disclaimers here, regarding free speech and our ability to exercise that right. even in my own uncertainty regarding the war, i find the majority of demonstrations distasteful at best. still, if they want to cover themselves in red paint and lay in the road all day instead of, you know, being productive, then i suppose that's their prerogative. it's my prerogative to roll my eyes at the television.

i am not anti-war. i am not pro-war. after eight months of researching fully valid reasoning on both sides of the fence, i really have no idea which side i fall on, but i know that whatever side it is, it is completely irrelevant.

i have two friends, three acquaintances, and several family members in the military. i do not personally know what war is like, but i have heard. the american side of the family all but died out in the civil war. my great grandfather fought in world war one; we have his helmet and a gun he took off a german soldier. my maternal grandfather fought in world war two; he was in d-day. my paternal grandfather was in korea; he still won't eat rice. my uncle was in vietnam; he was a helicopter pilot.

and here we are. my time won't be spent demonstrating against the war, and it won't be spent proving the merits of the war. there are enough people to do both of those things. i suspect my time will be spent praying, and thinking, and hoping, and watching. i will wash clothes, and change diapers, and run errands. come what may, we'll hold on for the ride.


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